* As we get older I think we all look back and wonder ‘What if’ I did things differently? Even small things like taking the spouse out for dinner a couple of extra times, or playing catch with the kids instead of just watching them. Then there’s the bigger things, what if I had a different job, followed my heart. Would I be where I am today? Would life have been better or worse? Questions, questions, and more questions, but never any real answers. There’s no answers because all the results are based on ‘What if’s’ and what might have been instead of what is real. There I go rambling on again. All I know is, I have some decisions to make. I have cancer and am lying in a bed. The hospital is waiting for my decisions. I guess I should start at the other end of my life. Or this will be an awfully short story. I was born and raised in a good home, actually a very good home. I have one sibling, a sister who now lives somewhere out west. In high school I was part of the geek set. I was. I don't think they would have a problem with the two of you talking."I continued, "Roger has some hate issues. You never told him who you had the affair with. I think he knows who it is now."She said, "I was afraid he would do something crazy and didn't want to see him hurt."I told her, "That's not the way Roger sees it. He sees you hiding a lover which hurt him even more."She said, "That's not true. Roger is the one I love but I made too many mistakes since then. I don't know if he will even talk to me."I said, "You can find out by approaching him and taking it from there."She looked at me and said, "You know, you have the same kind of problem only you're not divorced."I said, "I know. It's something I have to deal with."We finished up dinner and then we each went home. When I got back to my apartment there were my two sons waiting for me. I asked them what this was about?They said their mother didn't think I should be alone so they came to take me out. There she was thinking about.
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